clouds, clouds, clouds drifting, pulsing, watching— an endless vigil over our restless world. I lie here naked in stormy San Francisco weather, thinking of you. A Palestrina polyphony drifts through the room: layer upon layer of voices, two or more melodies circling and commingling, like a slow, ascending prayer. Memory returns me to last night, when you came to me as pure energy, softly pressed against my skin. Now I binge on sacred music, fast, kneel in pews, serve strangers in the neighborhood— anything to conjure that ominous charge of you. Cumulonimbus clouds— you’re like a cumulonimbus cloud, a cumulonimbus cloud. Cumulonimbus clouds— I tell my friends, “I can’t see her, but I feel her everywhere— this bizarre mind-body energy thing.” They say I’m crazy, but who needs them when I have an invisible lady? You’re overhead, more real than breath, and in each pause— between each chord of Palestrina’s layered hymn— I feel your current pulling me into orbit. Like intertwining spheres of polyphonic harmony, we fuck in thought, we fuck in a lucid dream— our bodies and minds rising in a slow crescendo until we’re one— beneath the sun. And I fast, and I pray, and I remain chaste, just to get to you.
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